1
Make your praise really specific and tailored to your child in that very moment. “You looked happy when you climbed a little higher today”
The question is… How useful is the term “Great job” does it tell a child what you would like them to repeat?
2
When giving praise you can simply describe what you saw. Try to avoid saving praise/rewards for the end of the week as toddlers are instant people.
It’s not always appropriate to praise. We might not want to disturb a child’s concentration and engagement with a task.
3
A specific praise example might be: “I like the way you adjusted your foot there to stay safe on the scooter and you wore your helmet today”
” I notice that following the park rules of waiting for your turn worked well for you today as you seemed to get to try more things”
4
Encourage your child’s own positive feelings about the experience to further reinforce the desired behaviour. “How did that feel? I notice you were smiling then?”
Instead of giving praise you could ask questions or simply start a conversation about the activity
5
Research suggests that’s it’s not a matter of how much praise we give to our child, but the way we praise them.
Praise given in the moment, with a specific description; with eye contact and a light touch is a winning combination!
6
Focus on their feelings rather than yours as this will impact their intrinsic motivation more. “How did that make you feel when you reached the next level on the climbing frame?” “I noticed you thinking it through and making safe adjustments.”
Say this instead?
7
“I noticed it was tricky for you at the park today when the boy took your ball. You asked him for an idea to play together, how did that go?”
Try out new things together… Talk about what worked
8
Be curious and connected so you can keep learning as a parent. Learning together. Instead of focussing on mistakes, describe progress, praise effort.
Sometimes acknowledging feelings can be more helpful than praise. We all want to be heard and seen.
9
Encourage a growth mindset- see caption for more on this… Give them the gift of seeing themselves as someone who gives things a go and perseveres.
Finally resist the temptation to praise by comparisons to others.